The Store Manager
Plants 'R' Us

Dear Sir.

I'm not normally one to complain but I am having a small problem with a plant I purchased form you last Monday. I bought it, as I said, last Monday and it is now Thursday and very little seems to have happened. The sales person assured me it was FAST GROWING and as I have witnessed NO ACTIVITY at all in that area I can only assume the plant is faulty. What is your policy on return or exchange? I really like the plant and would be keen to get a replacement in proper working order. Would it be possible to bring this one back and swap it for another. I would also like to wait to check on growth activity before I take it home. I wouldn't be a bother and would bring a packed lunch.
You really do have a fine establishment there and if we can just get over this one little hurdle you will have in me a most loyal patron indeed.

Yours sincerely,

Paris Portingale.

P.S. I have just checked again and - still no activity.

dy> l>